Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Author of Forgive for Good - Dr. Fred Luskin

During our show this upcoming Friday July 29th, at 5 pm on KDIA 1640 AM, we'll be interviewing Dr. Fred Luskin, author of Forgive for Good: A proven prescription for health and happiness.

Forgiveness is one of the key ways that we can achieve our goal of leading an exemplary life because it provides a way of emptying your emotional gas tank of all that anger and sadness and disappointment that you have inside of you. Once emptied, you can begin filling up your gas tank with positive emotional energy ? happiness and peace.

Forgiveness is a feeling of release and contentment that takes place in the present moment as you learn to take your hurt less personally and begin to assume responsibility for how you feel. Forgiveness does not change what happened in the past. It does not lessen the transgression you experienced. Rather it helps you to become part of the solution to the problem, rather than one more victim. In order to forgive, you must understand that pain and suffering are a part of life. It is life. You don?t live life without experiencing hurt and pain. That is the price you pay to play the game. You need to realize that forgiveness is done to benefit yourself. No one else. You do not need to speak face-to-face with the person who wronged you. You can forgive anyone you want, in your own mind, by yourself.

We decide to forgive NOT because it is good for anyone else. We choose to forgive because it will benefit us. When we forgive, we recover, we bounce back. When we forgive, we are resilient. When we are resilient, completely resilient, we are invincible, because at that point, we can bounce back quickly from anything hardship, any trauma, any loss.

According to Dr. Luskin, forgiveness is beneficial to us for three reasons. First, forgiveness penetrates the illusion that we are victims of our past, that we are chained to the wrongs that have been done to us. The past is the past. We cannot change it. The best you can do is to learn new ways of being in the present moment.

Second, by learning to forgive you can serve as an example to others. Forgiveness is not a trait that many possess. The world needs more individuals modeling forgiveness and showing individuals how to strengthen it. You are surrounded by people who are filled to the brim with rage, anger, sadness and disappointment, people who are in pain and don?t know how to escape it.

Forgiveness is a way out of that prison of pain. Forgiveness is a show of inner strength, NOT weakness. Forgiveness is a sign that you are able to rise above that which life has thrown your way. Forgiveness indicates to others that you have the power to overcome tragedy.

His third point is that as we learn to forgive, we are better equipped to share love and kindness with our loved ones and those around us. For if we are filled to the brim with anger and vitriol, we have no emotional bandwidth with which to help others. Emptying our gas tank of that anger allows us to refill it with positive emotional energy ? love, kindness and thoughtfulness. Only when we are filled with such positive emotions do we have a chance to share them with those around us. Otherwise, we allow our past hurts to intrude on our current relationships. Without forgiveness, we allow our accumulated anger to harm those who are trying their hardest to love us.

I am truly looking forward to speaking with Dr. Luskin on Friday. Tune in and join us!


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